I'm a home body. I like being at home, and I value my time spent doing what ever piddly dumb ass thing I want to do. Whether it be binge watching NetFlix or playing with my kittens or doing whatever it is I do on the vine, I get a lot of enjoyment out of moments of quiet and an empty house. This is way different than when I was younger and had to have people around all the time. Now it is my refuge.
The last few years have been hard because I'm rarely at home alone. My hubbie has been unemployed for a while now and that's been difficult on him and on our marriage. But for me the worst has been not having time alone. I love my alone time.
Recently his best friend was diagnosed with stage IV cancer. He has now moved in with us. Yea, I know...I'm crazy right?
It was my suggestion. He needs someone to help him get to his appointments and he shouldn't be left alone and since we are here all the time it made sense to me. He isn't doing well and I'm amazed at how fast this cancer is taking him down. My husband is having a hard time with the impending loss of his friend. I am hoping that this makes it easier both for his friend and for him to have him here. Its only been about 12 days since he moved in.
They are gone right now to the weekly chemo treatment. So I'm alone in the house and while I'm sort of enjoying the brief moment of quite alone time...I'm wondering if I didn't just invite a huge black cloud to take up residence over my home.
If any of you have dealt with cancer with a friend or family member and can offer suggestions for how to keep things from getting too dark and sad, I'd love to hear it.
What is your refuge from chaos?